Motherhood is hard enough without feeling like we’re walking a tightrope between loving others well and standing firm in what we believe.

Everywhere we turn, the world is shouting a different message than what we’re teaching our kids at home.

I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a little fearful about raising Luci in a world that tells her that truth is whatever feels right in the moment, and that being kind means agreeing with everything.

But that’s not the kind of love God calls us to.

So how do we, as moms, raise our kids to love others while standing firm in truth? How do we hold boundaries without bitterness?

How do we show kindness even when we completely disagree?

It all starts with our heart posture.

1. Love, Not Fear

📖 "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear." (1 John 4:18)

If I’m being honest, it’s easy to parent from fear, and I have a lot of it.

The world feels like it’s getting crazier by the day, and the urge to just shut it all out is real. But fear-based parenting doesn’t lead our kids to Christ—it just makes them anxious and uncertain.

Instead of reacting in fear, I want to respond in love.

That means:

✔ Teaching my daughter truth, even when it’s unpopular.

✔ Showing her how to stand firm without being hateful.

✔ Helping her love people without affirming everything they believe.

The goal isn’t to raise fearful kids—it’s to raise kids who are so deeply rooted in Christ that they stand strong no matter what.

2. Truth, Not Compromise

📖 "Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth." (John 17:17)

Let’s be clear: Truth matters. 

And loving people doesn’t mean agreeing with everything they say or do.

That’s the lie culture pushes on us.

But real love?

Real love speaks truth with grace.

✔ We can teach our kids to be kind while not bending on God’s design for identity, marriage, and life.

✔ We can show them how to disagree with respect instead of tearing others down.

✔ We can stand firm in truth without turning into angry, defensive people.

Jesus never compromised truth, but He also never shamed people into following Him. He led with love, and so should we.

3. Boundaries, Not Bitterness

📖 "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." (Proverbs 4:23)

One of the biggest lessons I want to teach my daughter is that loving someone doesn’t mean letting them walk all over you. 

Boundaries are good.

Boundaries are biblical.

Remember my post Motherhood, Boundaries + Faith: Continuing to Break Generational Patterns?

✔ We can say no and still love people well.

✔ We can hold firm to our values without being rude or judgmental.

✔ We can teach our kids that kindness doesn’t mean compliance.

It’s okay to walk away from toxic conversations.

It’s okay to set limits on what influences our kids.

And it’s okay to say, "I love you, but I don’t agree with you."

That’s not hate.

That’s wisdom.

4. Kindness, Not Hostility

📖 "Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt." (Colossians 4:6)

Here’s the thing: Our kids are watching us.

They see how we respond when we disagree with someone.

They hear our tone when we talk about tough topics. And if they see us acting bitter, angry, or sarcastic toward people who believe differently, guess what?

They’ll do the same.

I had to catch myself several times in talking to others about my latest posts A Teacher’s Confession: What I Saw in Schools That Made Me Leave.

It really makes me angry and I have to remind myself that Luci is watching me.

She sees how I talk about it with others, how I talk about others who disagree and my feelings on the topic.

But if they see us:

✔ Standing firm without tearing others down

✔ Speaking truth with kindness

✔ Loving people even when we completely disagree

…then they’ll learn how to do it, too.

It is NOT easy, especially when it is something we are passionate about, but the world doesn’t need more Christians who fight every battle in anger.

It needs more of us who stand strong in truth while leading with grace.

Look, I know it’s not easy raising kids in today’s culture.

But God chose us for this time. 

He picked you to be your child’s mom.

That means He’s equipping you, strengthening you, and giving you everything you need to raise them well.

So let’s be moms who:

❤️ Love deeply

✋ Hold boundaries firmly

🕊 Speak truth gently

🙏 Pray constantly- Ask God to show you you're heart. Ask him to show you the areas that need him most and ask him to work with you to heal them.

Lord, help us posture our hearts toward You so that we can guide our children in wisdom, love, and courage. Let us not bend to culture but stand firm in Your truth, always pointing to You in every conversation, disagreement, and boundary we set.

In Jesus' name, Amen.